I recall working with two boys on their reading comprehension. One of the boys noticed one of the keys to success that I had posted on the wall above me. He asked me what the key meant. The key had the words, "You are Awesome!" on it. I asked him if he was awesome. He shrunk back and sheepishly said, "No I don't think so." The other boy who was with him also said that he, himself was definitely not awesome. I was so surprised by not only their words but their body language as both boys became so much smaller.
After playing with them a bit on asking some questions about what would make a person awesome and what were their specific gifts, both boys were able to state with confidence that, 'Yes I am Awesome!" repeatedly in my presence. One boy talked of his gift of knowing all about dinosaurs and how proud he was of all that he knew about them, especially after I shared that I knew only a little about dinosaurs. The other was keen on his gift of drawing and how he could make stories of his drawings. It was a joy to see them expand out of their smallness and into the awareness of their own greatness.
As soon as mom showed up, things went back to being small and they saying that they weren't awesome. Interesting huh?
Any parent would be surprised by thinking that their kids didn't believe they were awesome and amazing and capable of great things, as was this mother. She did not have the luxury of seeing how enthusiastic her kids were about actually acknowledging that they are indeed awesome as I had the pleasure of experiencing. This got me to thinking about how kids will pick up how we feel about ourselves and the effect that has on how they see themselves. If parents don't believe that they are awesome, amazing, fabulous and capable then how can they give their kids permission to know that they are?
How comfortable is it to be around others who feel little and insignificant? And how easy is it to be confident in such company? And then how do you feel when you are around people who acknowledge that they are awesome and amazing? Do you feel uncomfortable around those people? Hmmm, verrry interesting. Kids are no different. I wonder if these boys were so in tune to their mother's point of vew of herself that they could not give themselves permission to be the confident, aspiring and awesome boys that they truly BE and just how uncomfortable that would be for them not having anyone to acknowledge their awesomeness!
This is why when parents can move beyond their issues, pains, sufferings and ideals of being small and insignificant and step into all that they can be in such amazing awareness and confidence they model and give their kids permission to do likewise. They aren't sending mixed messages to their kids by telling them how awesome they are but not allowing them can be more clear on who they are and what they are capable of being and doing. It is possible to get set free from what ails you- physically, mentally and emotionally. The first step is to simply ask a question like, "What is this all about?" and "What can I do to change this?" and then watch and see who or what shows up in your life as a possibility for you. Begin to allow yourself to acknowledge what is amazing, different, unique and fantabulous about you.
It is true that when we change ourselves we change the world, including our kids. What kind of change would you like to be?
Empowered Parent Challenge- If you haven't been comfortable acknowledging your gifts and the ways that you are awesome, start now by commenting below one (or more if you are up to the challenge) gift that you be that is awesome. Share it and allow this community to contribute to your awareness of your gifts. You may also want to share how your kids are awesome and let them see that you posted it. The challenge is on...
Mary shares her desire to create different possibilities for families and individuals who are looking to live a more conscious and aware lifestyle. BE YOU Parenting is for parents who want to BE all that they truly BE and to allow their kids the same privilege.